letters to his son, 1748-第22部分

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Loud　laughter　is　the　mirth　of　the　mob；　who　are　only　pleased　with　silly　things；　for　true　wit　or　good　sense　never　excited　a　laugh　since　the　creation　of　the　world。　　A　man　of　parts　and　fashion　is　therefore　only　seen　to　smile；　but　never　heard　to　laugh。

But　to　conclude　this　long　letter；　all　the　above…mentioned　rules；　however　carefully　you　may　observe　them；　will　lose　half　their　effect；　if　unaccompanied　by　the　Graces。　　Whatever　you　say；　if　you　say　it　with　a　supercilious；　cynical　face；　or　an　embarrassed　countenance；　or　a　silly；　disconcerted　grin；　will　be　ill　received。　　If；　into　the　bargain；　YOU　MUTTER　IT；　OR　UTTER　IT　INDISTINCTLY　AND　UNGRACEFULLY；　it　will　be　still　worse　received。　　If　your　air　and　address　are　vulgar；　awkward；　and　gauche；　you　may　be　esteemed　indeed；　if　you　have　great　intrinsic　merit；　but　you　will　never；　please；　and　without　pleasing　you　will　rise　but　heavily。　Venus；　among　the　ancients；　was　synonymous　with　the　Graces；　who　were　always　supposed　to　accompany　her；　and　Horace　tells　us　that　even　Youth　and　Mercury；　the　god　of　Arts　and　Eloquence；　would　not　do　without　her：

　　　　　　　　　　'Parum　comis　sine　to　Juventas　Mercuriusque。'

They　are　not　inexorable　Ladies；　and　may　be　had　if　properly；　and　diligently　pursued。　　Adieu。




LETTER　LV

BATH；　October　29；　O。　S。　　1748。

DEAR　BOY：　My　anxiety　for　your　success　increases　in　proportion　as　the　time　approaches　of　your　taking　your　part　upon　the　great　stage　of　the　world。　The　audience　will　form　their　opinion　of　you　upon　your　first　appearance　（making　the　proper　allowance　for　your　inexperience）；　and　so　far　it　will　be　final；　that；　though　it　may　vary　as　to　the　degrees；　it　will　never　totally　change。　　This　consideration　excites　that　restless　attention　with　which　I　am　constantly　examining　how　I　can　best　contribute　to　the　perfection　of　that　character；　in　which　the　least　spot　or　blemish　would　give　me　more　real　concern；　than　I　am　now　capable　of　feeling　upon　any　other　account　whatsoever。

I　have　long　since　done　mentioning　your　great　religious　and　moral　duties；　because　I　could　not　make　your　understanding　so　bad　a　compliment　as　to　suppose　that　you　wanted；　or　could　receive；　any　new　instructions　upon　those　two　important　points。　　Mr。　Harte；　I　am　sure；　has　not　neglected　them；　and；　besides；　they　are　so　obvious　to　common　sense　and　reason；　that　commentators　may　（as　they　often　do）　perplex；　but　cannot　make　them　clearer。　　My　province；　therefore；　is　to　supply　by　my　experience　your　hitherto　inevitable　inexperience　in　the　ways　of　the　world。　　People　at　your　age　are　in　a　state　of　natural　ebriety；　and　want　rails；　and　'gardefous'；　wherever　they　go；　to　hinder　them　from　breaking　their　necks。　This　drunkenness　of　youth　is　not　only　tolerated；　but　even　pleases；　if　kept　within　certain　bounds　of　discretion　and　decency。　　These　bounds　are　the　point　which　it　is　difficult　for　the　drunken　man　himself　to　find　out；　and　there　it　is　that　the　experience　of　a　friend　may　not　only　serve；　but　save　him。

Carry　with　you；　and　welcome；　into　company　all　the　gaiety　and　spirits；　but　as　little　of　the　giddiness；　of　youth　as　you　can。　　The　former　will　charm；　but　the　latter　will　often；　though　innocently；　implacably　offend。　　Inform　yourself　of　the　characters　and　situations　of　the　company；　before　you　give　way　to　what　your　imagination　may　prompt　you　to　say。　　There　are；　in　all　companies；　more　wrong　beads　than　right　ones；　and　many　more　who　deserve；　than　who　like　censure。　　Should　you　therefore　expatiate　in　the　praise　of　some　virtue；　which　some　in　company　notoriously　want；　or　declaim　against　any　vice；　which　others　are　notoriously　infected　with；　your　reflections；　however　general　and　unapplied；　will；　by　being　applicable；　be　thought　personal　and　leveled　at　those　people。　　This　consideration　points　out　to　you；　sufficiently；　not　to　be　suspicious　and　captious　yourself；　nor　to　suppose　that　things；　because　they　may　be；　are　therefore　meant　at　you。　The　manners　of　well…bred　people　secure　one　from　those　indirect　and　mean　attacks；　but　if；　by　chance；　a　flippant　woman　or　a　pert　coxcomb　lets　off　anything　of　that　kind；　it　is　much　better　not　to　seem　to　understand；　than　to　reply　to　it。

Cautiously　avoid　talking　of　either　your　own　or　other　people's　domestic　affairs。　　Yours　are　nothing　to　them　but　tedious；　theirs　are　nothing　to　you。　　The　subject　is　a　tender　one：　and　it　is　odds　but　that　you　touch　somebody　or　other's　sore　place：　for；　in　this　case；　there　is　no　trusting　to　specious　appearances；　which　may　be；　and　often　are；　so　contrary　to　the　real　situations　of　things；　between　men　and　their　wives；　parents　and　their　children；　seeming　friends；　etc。；　that；　with　the　best　intentions　in　the　world；　one　often　blunders　disagreeably。

Remember　that　the　wit；　humor；　and　jokes；　of　most　mixed　companies　are　local。　　They　thrive　in　that　particular　soil；　but　will　not　often　bear　transplanting。　　Every　company　is　differently　circumstanced；　has　its　particular　cant　and　jargon；　which　may　give　occasion　to　wit　and　mirth　within　that　circle；　but　would　seem　flat　and　insipid　in　any　other；　and　therefore　will　not　bear　repeating。　　Nothing　makes　a　man　look　sillier　than　a　pleasantry　not　relished　or　not　understood；　and　if　he　meets　with　a　profound　silence　when　he　expected　a　general　applause；　or；　what　is　worse；　if　he　is　desired　to　explain　the　bon　mot；　his　awkward　and　embarrassed　situation　is　easier　imagined'　than　described。　　'A　propos'　of　repeating；　take　great　care　never　to　repeat　（I　do　not　mean　here　the　pleasantries）　in　one　company　what　you　hear　in　another。　　Things；　seemingly　indifferent；　may；　by　circulation；　have　much　graver　consequences　than　you　would　imagine。　　Besides；　there　is　a　general　tacit　trust　in　conversation；　by　which　a　man　is　obliged　not　to　report　anything　out　of　it；　though　he　is　not　immediately　enjoined　to　secrecy。　　A　retailer　of　this　kind　is　sure　to　draw　himself　into　a　thousand　scrapes　and　discussions；　and　to　be　shyly　and　uncomfortably　received　wherever　he　goes。

You　will　find；　in　most　good　company；　some　people　who　only　keep　their　place　there　by　a　contemptible　title　enough；　these　are　what　we　call　VERY　GOOD…NATURED　FELLOWS；　and　the　French；　'bons　diables'。　　The　truth　is；　they　are　people　without　any　parts　or　fancy；　and　who；　having　no　will　of　their　own；　readily　assent　to；　concur　in；　and　applaud；　whatever　is　said　or　done　in　the　company；　and　adopt；　with　the　same　alacrity；　the　most　virtuous　or　the　most　criminal；　the　wisest　or　the　silliest　scheme；　that　happens　to　be　entertained　by　the　majority　of　the　company。　　This　foolish；　and　often　criminal　complaisance　flows　from　a　foolish　cause；the　want　of　any　other　merit。　　I　hope　that　you　will　hold　your　place　in　company　by　a　nobler　tenure；　and　that　you　will　hold　it　（you　can　bear　a　quibble；　I　believe；　yet）　'in　capite'。　　Have　a　will　and　an　opinion　of　your　own；　and　adhere　to　them　steadily；　but　then　do　it　with　good　humor；　good…breeding；　and　（if　you　have　it）　with　urbanity；　for　you　have　not　yet　heard　enough　either　to　preach　or　censure。

All　other　kinds　of　complaisance　are　not　only　blameless；　but　necessary　in　good　company。　　Not　to　seem　to　perceive　the　little　weaknesses；　and　the　idle　but　innocent　affectations　of　the　company；　but　even　to　flatter　them；　in　a　certain　manner；　is　not　only　very　allowable；　but；　in　truth；　a　sort　of　polite　duty。　　They　will　be　pleased　with　you；　if　you　do；　and　will　certainly　not　be　reformed　by　you　if　you　do　not。

For　instance：　you　will　find；　in　every　group　of　company；　two　principal　figures；　viz。；　the　fine　lady　and　the　fine　gentleman　who　absolutely　give　the　law　of　wit；　language；　fashion；　and　taste；　to　the　rest　of　that　society。　　There　is　always　a　strict；　and　often　for　the　time　being；　a　tender　alliance　between　these　two　figures。　　The　lady　looks　upon　her　empire　as　founded　upon　the　divine　right　of　beauty　（and　full　as　good　a　divine　right　it　is　as　any　king；　emperor；　or　pope；　can　pretend　to）；　she　requires；　and　commonly　meets　with；　unlimited　passive　obedience。　　And　why　should　she　not　meet　with　it？　　Her　demands　go　no　higher　than　to　have　her　unquestioned　preeminence　in　beauty；　wit；　and　fashion；　firmly　established。　Few　sovereigns　（by　the　way）　are　so　reasonable。　　The　fine　gentleman's　claims　of　right　are；　'mutatis　mutandis'；　the　same；　and　though；　indeed；　he　is　not　always　a　wit　'de　jure'；　yet；　as　he　is　the　wit　'de　facto'　of　that　company；　he　is　entitled　to　a　share　of　your　allegiance；　and　everybody　expects　at　least　as　much　as　they　are　entitled　to；　if　not　something　more。　Prudence　bids　you　make　your　court　to　these　joint　sovereigns；　and　no　duty；　that　I　know　of；　forbids　it。　　Rebellion　here　is　exceedingly　dangerous；　and　inevitably　punished　by　banishment；　and　immediate　forfeiture　of　all　your　wit；　manners；　taste；　and　fashion；　as；　on　the　other　hand；　a　cheerful　submission；　not　without　some　flattery；　is　sure　to　procure　you　a　strong　recommendation　and　most　effectual　pass；　throughout　all　their；　and　probably　the　neighboring；　dominions。　　With　a　moderate　share　of　sagacity；　you　will；　before　you　have　been　half　an　hour　in　their　company；　easily　discover　those　two　principal　figures：　both　by　the　deference　which　you　will　observe　the　whole　company　pay　them；　and　by　that　easy；　careless；　and　serene　air；　which　their　consciousness　of　power　gives　them。　　As　in　this　case；　so　in　all　others；　aim　always　at　the　highest；　get　always　into　the　highest　company；　and　address　yourself　particularly　to　the　highes