1 twilight暮色-第67部分

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not　suspicious。　She　must　be　attributing　the　change　in　her　vision　to　some　
maneuver　of　the　tracker's　rather　than　a　betrayal　by　me。　

Jasper　walked　silently　beside　me；　his　hand　on　the　small　of　my　back；　as　if　
he　were　guiding　me。　I　pretended　a　lack　of　interest　in　the　first　few　
airport　cafes；　my　head　scanning　for　what　I　really　wanted。　And　there　it　
was；　around　the　corner；　out　of　Alice's　sharp　sight：　the　levelthree　
ladies'　room。　

〃Do　you　mind？〃　I　asked　Jasper　as　we　passed。　〃I'll　just　be　a　moment。〃　

〃I'll　be　right　here；〃　he　said。　

As　soon　as　the　door　shut　behind　me；　I　was　running。　I　remembered　the　time　
I　had　gotten　lost　from　this　bathroom；　because　it　had　two　exits。　

Outside　the　far　door　it　was　only　a　short　sprint　to　the　elevators；　and　if　
Jasper　stayed　where　he　said　he　would；　I'd　never　be　in　his　line　of　sight。　
I　didn't　look　behind　me　as　I　ran。　This　was　my　only　chance；　and　even　if　he　
saw　me；　I　had　to　keep　going。　People　stared；　but　I　ignored　them。　Around　
the　corner　the　elevators　were　waiting；　and　I　dashed　forward；　throwing　my　
hand　between　the　closing　doors　of　a　full　elevator　headed　down。　I　squeezed　
in　beside　the　irritated　passengers；　and　checked　to　make　sure　that　the　
button　for　level　one　had　been　pushed。　It　was　already　lit；　and　the　doors　
closed。　

As　soon　as　the　door　opened　I　was　off　again；　to　the　sound　of　annoyed　
murmurs　behind　me。　I　slowed　myself　as　I　passed　the　security　guards　by　the　
luggage　carousels；　only　to　break　into　a　run　again　as　the　exit　doors　came　
into　view。　I　had　no　way　of　knowing　if　Jasper　was　looking　for　me　yet。　

I　would　have　only　seconds　if　he　was　following　my　scent。　I　jumped　out　the　
automatic　doors；　nearly　smacking　into　the　glass　when　they　opened　too　
slowly。　

Along　the　crowded　curb　there　wasn't　a　cab　in　sight。　

I　had　no　time。　Alice　and　Jasper　were　either　about　to　realize　I　was　gone；　
or　they　already　had。　They　would　find　me　in　a　heartbeat。　

A　shuttle　to　the　Hyatt　was　just　closing　its　doors　a　few　feet　behind　me。　

〃Wait！〃　I　called；　running；　waving　at　the　driver。　

〃This　is　the　shuttle　to　the　Hyatt；〃　the　driver　said　in　confusion　as　he　
opened　the　doors。　

〃Yes；〃　I　huffed；　〃that's　where　I'm　going。〃　I　hurried　up　the　steps。　

He　looked　askance　at　my　luggageless　state；　but　then　shrugged；　not　caring　
enough　to　ask。　

Most　of　the　seats　were　empty。　I　sat　as　far　from　the　other　travelers　as　
possible；　and　watched　out　the　window　as　first　the　sidewalk；　and　then　the　
airport；　drifted　away。　I　couldn't　help　imagining　Edward；　where　he　would　
stand　at　the　edge　of　the　road　when　he　found　the　end　of　my　trail。　I　
couldn't　cry　yet；　I　told　myself。　I　still　had　a　long　way　to　go。　

My　luck　held。　In　front　of　the　Hyatt；　a　tiredlooking　couple　was　getting　
their　last　suitcase　out　of　the　trunk　of　a　cab。　I　jumped　out　of　the　
shuttle　and　ran　to　the　cab；　sliding　into　the　seat　behind　the　driver。　The　
tired　couple　and　the　shuttle　driver　stared　at　me。　

I　told　the　surprised　cabbie　my　mother's　address。　〃I　need　to　get　there　as　
soon　as　possible。〃　

〃That's　in　Scottsdale；〃　he　plained。　

I　threw　four　twenties　over　the　seat。　

〃Will　that　be　enough？〃　

〃Sure；　kid；　no　problem。〃　

I　sat　back　against　the　seat；　folding　my　arms　across　my　lap。　The　familiar　
city　began　to　rush　around　me；　but　I　didn't　look　out　the　windows。　I　
exerted　myself　to　maintain　control。　I　was　determined　not　to　lose　myself　
at　this　point；　now　that　my　plan　was　successfully　pleted。　There　was　no　
point　in　indulging　in　more　terror；　more　anxiety。　My　path　was　set。　I　just　
had　to　follow　it　now。　

So；　instead　of　panicking；　I　closed　my　eyes　and　spent　the　twenty　minutes'　

drive　with　Edward。　

I　imagined　that　I　had　stayed　at　the　airport　to　meet　Edward。　I　visualized　
how　I　would　stand　on　my　toes；　the　sooner　to　see　his　face。　How　quickly；　
how　gracefully　he　would　move　through　the　crowds　of　people　separating　us。　
And　then　I　would　run　to　close　those　last　few　feet　between　us　—　reckless　
as　always　—　and　I　would　be　in　his　marble　arms；　finally　safe。　

I　wondered　where　we　would　have　gone。　North　somewhere；　so　he　could　be　
outside　in　the　day。　Or　maybe　somewhere　very　remote；　so　we　could　lay　in　
the　sun　together　again。　I　imagined　him　by　the　shore；　his　skin　sparkling　
like　the　sea。　It　wouldn't　matter　how　long　we　had　to　hide。　To　be　trapped　
in　a　hotel　room　with　him　would　be　a　kind　of　heaven。　So　many　questions　I　
still　had　for　him。　I　could　talk　to　him　forever；　never　sleeping；　never　
leaving　his　side。　

I　could　see　his　face　so　clearly　now…　almost　hear　his　voice。　And；　despite　
all　the　horror　and　hopelessness；　I　was　fleetingly　happy。　So　involved　was　
I　in　my　escapist　daydreams；　I　lost　all　track　of　the　seconds　racing　by。　

〃Hey；　what　was　the　number？〃　

The　cabbie's　question　punctured　my　fantasy；　letting　all　the　colors　run　
out　of　my　lovely　delusions。　Fear；　bleak　and　hard；　was　waiting　to　fill　the　
empty　space　they　left　behind。　

〃Fiftyeight　twentyone。〃　My　voice　sounded　strangled。　The　cabbie　looked　
at　me；　nervous　that　I　was　having　an　episode　or　something。　

〃Here　we　are；　then。〃　He　was　anxious　to　get　me　out　of　his　car；　probably　
hoping　I　wouldn't　ask　for　my　change。　

〃Thank　you；〃　I　whispered。　There　was　no　need　to　be　afraid；　I　reminded　
myself。　The　house　was　empty。　I　had　to　hurry；　my　mom　was　waiting　for　me；　
frightened；　depending　on　me。　

I　ran　to　the　door；　reaching　up　automatically　to　grab　the　key　under　the　
eave。　I　unlocked　the　door。　It　was　dark　inside；　empty；　normal。　I　ran　to　
the　phone；　turning　on　the　kitchen　light　on　my　way。　There；　on　the　
whiteboard；　was　a　tendigit　number　written　in　a　small；　neat　hand。　My　
fingers　stumbled　over　the　keypad；　making　mistakes。　I　had　to　hang　up　and　
start　again。　I　concentrated　only　on　the　buttons　this　time；　carefully　
pressing　each　one　in　turn。　I　was　successful。　I　held　the　phone　to　my　ear　
with　a　shaking　hand。　It　rang　only　once。　

〃Hello；　Bella；〃　that　easy　voice　answered。　〃That　was　very　quick。　I'm　
impressed。〃　

〃Is　my　mom　all　right？〃　

〃She's　perfectly　fine。　Don't　worry；　Bella；　I　have　no　quarrel　with　her。　
Unless　you　didn't　e　alone；　of　course。〃　Light；　amused。　

〃I'm　alone。〃　I'd　never　been　more　alone　in　my　entire　life。　

〃Very　good。　Now；　do　you　know　the　ballet　studio　just　around　the　corner　
from　your　home？〃　

〃Yes。　I　know　how　to　get　there。〃　

〃Well；　then；　I'll　see　you　very　soon。〃　

I　hung　up。　

I　ran　from　the　room；　through　the　door；　out　into　the　baking　heat。　

There　was　no　time　to　look　back　at　my　house；　and　I　didn't　want　to　see　it　
as　it　was　now　—　empty；　a　symbol　of　fear　instead　of　sanctuary。　The　last　
person　to　walk　through　those　familiar　rooms　was　my　enemy。　

From　the　corner　of　my　eye；　I　could　almost　see　my　mother　standing　in　the　
shade　of　the　big　eucalyptus　tree　where　I'd　played　as　a　child。　Or　kneeling　

by　the　little　plot　of　dirt　around　the　mailbox；　the　cemetery　of　all　the　
flowers　she'd　tried　to　grow。　The　memories　were　better　than　any　reality　I　
would　see　today。　But　I　raced　away　from　them；　toward　the　corner；　leaving　
everything　behind　me。　

I　felt　so　slow；　like　I　was　running　through　wet　sand　—　I　couldn't　seem　to　
get　enough　purchase　from　the　concrete。　I　tripped　several　times；　once　
falling；　catching　myself　with　my　hands；　scraping　them　on　the　sidewalk；　
and　then　lurching　up　to　plunge　forward　again。　But　at　last　I　made　it　to　
the　corner。　Just　another　street　now；　I　ran；　sweat　pouring　down　my　face；　
gasping。　The　sun　was　hot　on　my　skin；　too　bright　as　it　bounced　off　the　
white　concrete　and　blinded　me。　I　felt　dangerously　exposed。　More　fiercely　
than　I　would　have　dreamed　I　was　capable　of；　I　wished　for　the　green；　
protective　forests　of　Forks…　of　home。　

When　I　rounded　the　last　corner；　onto　Cactus；　I　could　see　the　studio；　
looking　just　as　I　remembered　it。　The　parking　lot　in　front　was　empty；　the　
vertical　blinds　in　all　the　windows　drawn。　I　couldn't　run　anymore　—　I　
couldn't　breathe；　exertion　and　fear　had　gotten　the　best　of　me。　I　thought　
of　my　mother　to　keep　my　feet　moving；　one　in　front　of　the　other。　

As　I　got　closer；　I　could　see　the　sign　inside　the　door。　It　was　handwritten　
on　hot　pink　paper；　it　said　the　dance　studio　was　closed　for　spring　break。　
I　touched　the　handle；　tugged　on　it　cautiously。　It　was　unlocked。　I　fought　
to　catch　my　breath；　and　opened　the　door。　

The　lobby　was　dark　and　empty；　cool；　the　air　conditioner　thrumming。　The　
plastic　molded　chairs　were　stacked　along　the　walls；　and　the　carpet　
smelled　like　shampoo。　The　west　dance　floor　was　dark；　I　could　see　through　
the　open　viewing　window。　The　east　dance　floor；　the　bigger　room；　was　lit。　
But　the　blinds　were　closed　on　the　window。　

Terror　seized　me　so　strongly　that　I　was　literally　trapped　by　it。　I　
couldn't　make　my　feet　move　forward。　

And　then　my　mother's　voice　called。　

〃Bella？　Bella？〃　That　same　tone　of　hysterical　panic。　I　sprinted　to　the　
door；　to　the　sound　of　her　voice。　

〃Bella；　you　scared　me！　Don't　you　ever　do　that　to　me　again！〃　Her　voice　
continued　as　I　ran　into　the　long；　highceilinged　room。　

I　stared　around　me；　trying　to　find　where　her　voice　was　ing　from。　I　
heard　her　laugh；　and　I　whirled　to　the　sound。　

There　she　was；　on　the　TV　screen；　tousling　my　hair　in　relief。　It　was　
Thanksgiving；　and　I　was　twelve。　We'd　gone　to　s