misc writings and speeches(米斯克说与写3)-第16部分
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Before the young man left the university； his hereditary malady had
broken forth in a singularly cruel form。 He had become an incurable
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THE MISCELLANEOUS WRITINGS AND SPEECHES OF LORD MACAULAY。
hypochondriac。 He said long after that he had been mad all his life； or at
least not perfectly sane； and； in truth； eccentricities less strange than his
have often been thought grounds sufficient for absolving felons； and for
setting aside wills。 His grimaces； his gestures； his mutterings； sometimes
diverted and sometimes terrified people who did not know him。 At a
dinner table he would； in a fit of absence； stoop down and twitch off a
lady's shoe。 He would amaze a drawing…room by suddenly ejaculating a
clause of the Lord's Prayer。 He would conceive an unintelligible aversion
to a particular alley； and perform a great circuit rather than see the hateful
place。 He would set his heart on touching every post in the streets through
which he walked。 If by any chance he missed a post； he would go back a
hundred yards and repair the omission。 Under the influence of his disease；
his senses became morbidly torpid； and his imagination morbidly active。
At one time he would stand poring on the town clock without being able to
tell the hour。 At another； he would distinctly hear his mother； who was
many miles off； calling him by his name。 But this was not the worst。 A
deep melancholy took possession of him； and gave a dark tinge to all his
views of human nature and of human destiny。 Such wretchedness as he
endured has driven many men to shoot themselves or drown themselves。
But he was under no temptation to commit suicide。 He was sick of life； but
he was afraid of death； and he shuddered at every sight or sound which
reminded him of the inevitable hour。 In religion he found but little comfort
during his long and frequent fits of dejection； for his religion partook of
his own character。 The light from heaven shone on him indeed； but not in a
direct line； or with its own pure splendour。 The rays had to struggle
through a disturbing medium； they reached him refracted； dulled and
discoloured by the thick gloom which had settled on his soul； and； though
they might be sufficiently clear to guide him； were too dim to cheer him。
With such infirmities of body and mind； this celebrated man was left；
at two…and…twenty； to fight his way through the world。 He remained during
about five years in the midland counties。 At Lichfield； his birthplace and
his early home； he had inherited some friends and acquired others。 He was
kindly noticed by Henry Hervey； a gay officer of noble family； who
happened to be quartered there。 Gilbert Walmesley； registrar of the
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ecclesiastical court of the diocese； a man of distinguished parts； learning；
and knowledge of the world； did himself honour by patronising the young
adventurer； whose repulsive person； unpolished manners； and squalid garb
moved many of the petty aristocracy of the neighbourhood to laughter or
to disgust。 At Lichfield； however； Johnson could find no way of earning a
livelihood。 He became usher of a grammar school in Leicestershire； he
resided as a humble companion in the house of a country gentleman； but a
life of dependence was insupportable to his haughty spirit。 He repaired to
Birmingham； and there earned a few guineas by literary drudgery。 In that
town he printed a translation； little noticed at the time； and long forgotten；
of a Latin book about Abyssinia。 He then put forth proposals for
publishing by subscription the poems of Politian； with notes containing a
history of modern Latin verse： but subscriptions did not come in； and the
volume never appeared。
While leading this vagrant and miserable life； Johnson fell in love。 The
object of his passion was Mrs Elizabeth Porter； a widow who had children
as old as himself。 To ordinary spectators； the lady appeared to be a short；
fat； coarse woman； painted half an inch thick； dressed in gaudy colours；
and fond of exhibiting provincial airs and graces which were not exactly
those of the Queensberrys and Lepels。 To Johnson； however； whose
passions were strong； whose eyesight was too weak to distinguish ceruse
from natural bloom； and who had seldom or never been in the same room
with a woman of real fashion； his Titty； as he called her； was the most
beautiful； graceful； and accomplished of her sex。 That his admiration was
unfeigned cannot be doubted； for she was as poor as himself。 She accepted；
with a readiness which did her little honour； the addresses of a suitor who
might have been her son。 The marriage； however； in spite of occasional
wranglings； proved happier than might have been expected。 The lover
continued to be under the illusions of the wedding…day till the lady died in
her sixty…fourth year。 On her monument he placed an inscription extolling
the charms of her person and of her manners； and when； long after her
decease； he had occasion to mention her； he exclaimed； with a tenderness
half ludicrous； half pathetic； 〃Pretty creature！〃
His marriage made it necessary for him to exert himself more
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THE MISCELLANEOUS WRITINGS AND SPEECHES OF LORD MACAULAY。
strenuously than he had hitherto done。 He took a house in the
neighbourhood of his native town； and advertised for pupils。 But eighteen
months passed away； and only three pupils came to his academy。 Indeed；
his appearance was so strange； and his temper so violent； that his
schoolroom must have resembled an ogre's den。 Nor was the tawdry
painted grandmother whom he called his Titty well qualified to make
provision for the comfort of young gentlemen。 David Garrick； who was
one of the pupils； used； many years later； to throw the best company of
London into convulsions of laughter by mimicking the endearments of this
extraordinary pair。
At length Johnson； in the twenty…eighth year of his age； determined to
seek his fortune in the capital as a literary adventurer。 He set out with a
few guineas； three acts of the tragedy of Irene in manuscript； and two or
three letters of introduction from his friend Walmesley。
Never； since literature became a calling in England； had it been a less
gainful calling than at the time when Johnson took up his residence in
London。 In the preceding generation a writer of eminent merit was sure to
be munificently rewarded by the government。 The least that he could
expect was a pension or a sinecure place； and； if he showed any aptitude
for politics； he might hope to be a member of parliament； a lord of the
treasury； an ambassador； a secretary of state。 It would be easy； on the other
hand； to name several writers of the nineteenth century of whom the least
successful has received forty thousand pounds from the booksellers。 But
Johnson entered on his vocation in the most dreary part of the dreary
interval which separated two ages of prosperity。 Literature had ceased to
flourish under the patronage of the great； and had not begun to flourish
under the patronage of the public。 One man of letters； indeed； Pope； had
acquired by his pen what was then considered as a handsome fortune； and
lived on a footing of equality with nobles and ministers of state。 But this
was a solitary exception。 Even an author whose reputation was established；
and whose works were popular； such an author as Thomson； whose
Seasons were in every library； such an author as Fielding； whose Pasquin
had had a greater run than any drama since The Beggar's Opera； was
sometimes glad to obtain； by pawning his best coat； the means of dining
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THE MISCELLANEOUS WRITINGS AND SPEECHES OF LORD MACAULAY。
on tripe at a cookshop underground； where he could wipe his hands； after
his greasy meal； on the back of a
