the crime of sylvestre bonnard(西维斯特·博拉德的罪行)-第5部分
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flowered petticoat； and her long legs。
〃Uncle；〃 I said； with a great effort； 〃will you buy that doll for me？〃
And I waited。
〃Buy a doll for a boysacrebleu！〃 cried my uncle； in a voice of
thunder。 〃Do you wish to dishonour yourself？ And it is that old Mag there
that you want！ Well； I must compliment you； my young fellow！ If you
grow up with such tastes as that； you will never have any pleasure in life；
and your comrades will call you a precious ninny。 If you asked me for a
sword or a gun； my boy； I would buy them for you with the last silver
crown of my pension。 But to buy a doll for youby all that's holy！to
disgrace you！ Never in the world！ Why； if I were ever to see you playing
with a puppet rigged out like that； Monsieur； my sister's son； I would
disown you for my nephew！〃
On hearing these words； I felt my heart so wrung that nothing but
pridea diabolical pridekept me from crying。
My uncle； suddenly calming down； returned to his ideas about the
Bourbons； but I； still smarting under the weight of his indignation； felt an
unspeakable shame。 My resolve was quickly made。 I promised myself
never to disgrace myselfI firmly and for ever renounced that red…cheeked
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doll。
I felt that day； for the first time； the austere sweetness of sacrifice。
Captain； though it be true that all your life you swore like a pagan；
smoked like a beadle； and drank like a bell…ringer； be your memory
nevertheless honourednot merely because you were a brave soldier； but
also because you revealed to your little nephew in petticoats the sentiment
of heroism！ Pride and laziness had made you almost insupportable； Uncle
Victor！but a great heart used to beat under those frogs upon your coat。
You always used to wear； I now remember； a rose in your button…hole。
That rose which you offered so readily to the shop…girlsthat large； open…
hearted flower； scattering its petals to all the winds； was the symbol of
your glorious youth。 You despised neither wine nor tobacco； but you
despised life。 Neither delicacy nor common sense could have been learned
from you； Captain； but you taught me； even at an age when my nurse had
to wipe my nose； a lesson of honour and self…abrogation that I shall never
forget。
You have now been sleeping for many years in the Cemetery of Mont…
Parnasse； under a plain slab bearing the epitaph：
CI…GIT ARISTIDE VICTOR MALDENT； Capitaine d'Infanterie；
Chevalier de la Legion d'Honneur。
But such； Captain； was not the inscription devised by yourself to be
placed above those old bones of yoursknocked about so long on fields of
battle and in haunts of pleasure。 Among your papers was found this proud
and bitter epitaph； which； despite your last will none could have ventured
to put upon your tomb：
CI…GIT UN BRIGAND DE LA LOIRE
〃Therese； we will get a wreath of immortelles to…morrow； and lay them
on the tomb of the Brigand of the Loire。〃 。。。
But Therese is not here。 And how； indeed； could she be near me；
seeing that I am at the rondpoint of the Champs…Elysees？ There； at the
termination of the avenue； the Arc de Triomphe； which bears under its
vaults the names of Uncle Victor's companions…in…arms； opens its giant
gate against the sky。 The trees of the avenue are unfolding to the sun of
spring their first leaves； still all pale and chilly。 Beside me the carriages
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keep rolling by to the Bois de Boulogne。 Unconsciously I have wandered
into this fashionable avenue on my promenade； and halted； quite stupidly；
in front of a booth stocked with gingerbread and decanters of liquorice…
water； each topped by a lemon。 A miserable little boy； covered with rags；
which expose his chapped skin； stares with widely opened eyes at those
sumptuous sweets which are not for such as he。 With the shamelessness of
innocence he betrays his longing。 His round； fixed eyes contemplate a
certain gingerbread man of lofty stature。 It is a general； and it looks a little
like Uncle Victor。 I take it； I pay for it； and present it to the little pauper；
who dares not extend his hand to receive itfor； by reason of precocious
experience； he cannot believe in luck； he looks at me； in the same way that
certain big dogs do； with the air of one saying； 〃You are cruel to make fun
of me like that！〃
〃Come； little stupid；〃 I say to him； in that rough tone I am accustomed
to use； 〃take ittake it； and eat it； for you； happier than I was at your age；
you can satisfy your tastes without disgracing yourself。〃。。。And you； Uncle
Victoryou； whose manly figure has been recalled to me by that
gingerbread general； come； glorious Shadow； help me to forget my new
doll。 We remain for ever children； and are always running after new toys。
Same day。
In the oddest way that Coccoz family has become associated in my
mind with the Clerk Alexander。
〃Therese；〃 I said； as I threw myself into my easy…chair； 〃tell me if the
little Coccoz is well； and whether he has got his first teeth yetand bring
me my slippers。〃
〃He ought to have them by this time； Monsieur；〃 replied Therese； 〃but
I never saw them。 The very first fine day of spring the mother disappeared
with the child； leaving furniture and clothes and everything behind her。
They found thirty…eight empty pomade…pots in the attic。 It passes all belief！
She had visitors latterly； and you may be quite sure she is not now in a
convent of nuns。 The niece of the concierge says she saw her driving about
in a carriage on the boulevards。 I always told you she would end badly。〃
〃Therese；〃 I replied； 〃that young woman has not ended either badly or
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well as yet。 Wait until the term of her life is over before you judge her。
And be careful not to talk too much with that concierge。 It seemed to me
though I only saw her for a moment on the stairs that Madame Coccoz
was very fond of her child。 For that mother's love at least； she deserves
credit。〃
〃As far as that goes； Monsieur； certainly the little one never wanted for
anything。 In all the Quarter one could not have found a child better kept；
or better nourished； or more petted and coddled。 Every day that God
makes she puts a clean bib on him； and sings to him to make him laugh
from morning till night。〃
〃Therese； a poet has said； 'That child whose mother has never smiled
upon him is worthy neither of the table of the gods nor of the couch of the
goddesses。'〃
July 8； 1852。
Having been informed that the Chapel of the Virgin at Saint…
Germain… des…Pres was being repaved； I entered the church with the hope
of discovering some old inscriptions； possibly exposed by the labours of
the workmen。 I was not disappointed。 The architect kindly showed me a
stone which he had just had raised up against the wall。 I knelt down to
look at the inscription engraved upon that stone； and then； half aloud； I
read in the shadow of the old apsis these words； which made my heart
leap：
〃Cy…gist Alexandre； moyne de ceste eglise； qui fist mettre en argent le
menton de Saint…Vincent et de Saint…Amant et le pie des Innocens； qui
toujours en son vivant fut preud'homme et vayllant。 Priez pour l'ame de
lui。〃
I wiped gently away with my handkerchief the dust covering that
gravestone； I could have kissed it。
〃It is he！ it is Alexander！〃 I cried out； and from the height of the vaults
the name fell back upon me with a clang； as if broken。
The silent severity of the beadle； whom I saw advancing towards me；
made me ashamed of my enthusiasm； and I fled between the two holy
water sprinklers with which tow rival 〃rats d'eglise〃 seemed desirous of
