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     I think it is not an exaggeration to say that the Queen looked as
     young and beautiful as she did thirty…five years ago when I saw her
     first。  I did not say this to her; because I learned long ago never
     to say the obvious thing; but leave the obvious thing to commonplace
     and inexperienced people to say。  That she still looked to me as
     young and beautiful as she did thirty…five years ago is good
     evidence that ten thousand people have already noticed this and have
     mentioned it to her。  I could have said it and spoken the truth; but
     I was too wise for that。  I kept the remark unuttered and saved her
     Majesty the vexation of hearing it the ten…thousand…and…oneth time。

     All that report about my proposal to buy Windsor Castle and its
     grounds was a false rumor。  I started it myself。

     One newspaper said I patted his Majesty on the shoulderan
     impertinence of which I was not guilty; I was reared in the most
     exclusive circles of Missouri and I know how to behave。  The King
     rested his hand upon my arm a moment or two while we were chatting;
     but he did it of his own accord。  The newspaper which said I talked
     with her Majesty with my hat on spoke the truth; but my reasons for
     doing it were good and sufficientin fact unassailable。  Rain was
     threatening; the temperature had cooled; and the Queen said; 〃Please
     put your hat on; Mr。 Clemens。〃  I begged her pardon and excused
     myself from doing it。  After a moment or two she said; 〃Mr。 Clemens;
     put your hat on〃with a slight emphasis on the word 〃on〃 〃I can't
     allow you to catch cold here。〃  When a beautiful queen commands it
     is a pleasure to obey; and this time I obeyedbut I had already
     disobeyed once; which is more than a subject would have felt
     justified in doing; and so it is true; as charged; I did talk with
     the Queen of England with my hat on; but it wasn't fair in the
     newspaper man to charge it upon me as an impoliteness; since there
     were reasons for it which he could not know of。

Nearly all the members of the British royal family were there; and there
were foreign visitors which included the King of Siam and a party of
India princes in their gorgeous court costumes; which Clemens admired
openly and said he would like to wear himself。

The English papers spoke of it as one of the largest and most
distinguished parties ever given at Windsor。  Clemens attended it in
company with Mr。 and Mrs。 J。 Henniker Heaton; and when it was over Sir
Thomas Lipton joined them and motored with them back to Brown's。

He was at Archdeacon Wilberforce's next day; where a curious circumstance
developed。  When he arrived Wilberforce said to him; in an undertone:

〃Come into my library。  I have something to show you。〃

In the library Clemens was presented to a Mr。 Pole; a plain…looking man;
suggesting in dress and appearance the English tradesman。  Wilberforce
said:

〃Mr。 Pole; show to Mr。 Clemens what you have brought here。〃

Mr。 Pole unrolled a long strip of white linen and brought to view at last
a curious; saucer…looking vessel of silver; very ancient in appearance;
and cunningly overlaid with green glass。  The archdeacon took it and
handed it to Clemens as some precious jewel。  Clemens said:

〃What is it?〃

Wilberforce impressively answered:

〃It is the Holy Grail。〃

Clemens naturally started with surprise。

〃You may well start;〃 said Wilberforce; 〃but it's the truth。  That is the
Holy Grail。〃

Then he gave this explanation: Mr。 Pole; a grain merchant of Bristol; had
developed some sort of clairvoyant power; or at all events he had dreamed
several times with great vividness the location of the true Grail。 
Another dreamer; a Dr。 Goodchild; of Bath; was mixed up in the matter;
and between them this peculiar vessel; which was not a cup; or a goblet;
or any of the traditional things; had been discovered。  Mr。 Pole seemed a
man of integrity; and it was clear that the churchman believed the
discovery to be genuine and authentic。  Of course there could be no
positive proof。  It was a thing that must be taken on trust。  That the
vessel itself was wholly different from anything that the generations had
conceived; and was apparently of very ancient make; was opposed to the
natural suggestion of fraud。

Clemens; to whom the whole idea of the Holy Grail was simply a poetic
legend and myth; had the feeling that he had suddenly been transmigrated;
like his own Connecticut Yankee; back into the Arthurian days; but he
made no question; suggested no doubt。  Whatever it was; it was to them
the materialization of a symbol of faith which ranked only second to the
cross itself; and he handled it reverently and felt the honor of having
been one of the first permitted to see the relic。  In a subsequent
dictation he said:

     I am glad I have lived to see that half…hourthat astonishing half…
     hour。  In its way it stands alone in my life's experience。  In the
     belief of two persons present this was the very vessel which was
     brought by night and secretly delivered to Nicodemus; nearly
     nineteen centuries ago; after the Creator of the universe had
     delivered up His life on the cross for the redemption of the human
     race; the very cup which the stainless Sir Galahad had sought with
     knightly devotion in far fields of peril and adventure in Arthur's
     time; fourteen hundred years ago; the same cup which princely
     knights of other bygone ages had laid down their lives in long and
     patient efforts to find; and had passed from life disappointedand
     here it was at last; dug up by a grain…broker at no cost of blood or
     travel; and apparently no purity required of him above the average
     purity of the twentieth…century dealer in cereal futures; not even a
     stately name requiredno Sir Galahad; no Sir Bors de Ganis; no Sir
     Lancelot of the Lakenothing but a mere Mr。 Pole。 'From the New
     York Sun somewhat later: 〃Mr。 Pole communicated the discovery to a
     dignitary of the Church of England; who summoned a number of eminent
     persons; including psychologists; to see and discuss it。  Forty
     attended; including some peers with ecclesiastical interests;
     Ambassador Whitelaw Reid; Professor Crookas; and ministers of
     various religious bodies; including the Rev。 R。 J。 Campbell。  They
     heard Mr。 Pole's story with deep attention; but he could not prove
     the genuineness of the relic。〃'

Clemens saw Mr。 and Mrs。 Rogers at Claridge's Hotel that evening; lunched
with his old friends Sir Norman and Lady Lockyer next day; took tea with
T。 P。 O'Connor at the House of Commons; and on the day following; which
was June a 5th; he was the guest of honor at one of the most elaborate
occasions of his visita luncheon given by the Pilgrims at the Savoy
Hotel。  It would be impossible to set down here a report of the doings;
or even a list of the guests; of that gathering。  The Pilgrims is a club
with branches on both sides of the ocean; and Mark Twain; on either side;
was a favorite associate。  At this luncheon the picture on the bill of
fare represented him as a robed pilgrim; with a great pen for his staff;
turning his back on the Mississippi River and being led along his
literary way by a huge jumping frog; to which he is attached by a string。 
On a guest…card was printed:

     Pilot of many Pilgrims since the shout
     〃Mark Twain!〃that serves you for a deathless sign
     On Mississippi's waterway rang out
     Over the plummet's line

     Still where the countless ripples laugh above
     The blue of halcyon seas long may you keep 
     Your course unbroken; buoyed upon a love
     Ten thousand fathoms deep!

                                   O。 S。  'OWEN SEAMAN'。

Augustine Birrell made the speech of introduction; closing with this
paragraph:

     Mark Twain is a man whom Englishmen and Americans do well to honor。 
     He is a true consolidator of nations。  His delightful humor is of
     the kind which dissipates and destroys national prejudices。  His
     truth and his honorhis love of truth and his love of honor
     overflow all boundaries。  He has made the world better by his
     presence; and we rejoice to see him here。  Long may he live to reap
     a plentiful harvest of hearty honest human affection。

The toast was drunk standing。  Then Clemens rose and made a speech which
delighted all England。  In his introduction Mr。 Birrell had happened to
say; 〃How I came here I will not ask!〃  Clemens remembered this; and
looking down into Mr。 Birrell's wine…glass; which was apparently unused;
he said:

〃Mr。 Birrell doesn't know how he got here。  But he will be able to get
away all righthe has not drunk anything since he came。〃

He told stories about Howells and Twichell; and how Darwin had gone to
sleep reading his books; and then he came down to personal things and
company; and told them how; on the day of his arrival; he had been
shocked to read on a great placard; 〃Mark Twain Arrives: Ascot Cup
Stolen。〃

     No doubt many a person was misled by those sentences joi

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